Wide World of Shorts So my flag football team made a good…

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Posted by: branthansen Original: 7/8/2006 8:57 AM Views: 106 Comments: 9 eProps: 14 Read Comments Post a Comment Back to Your Xanga Site

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2 eProps from: Hawkeye101 DougHannah RevJeffreyNE befriendthemoose creationfreak316 SteveJ joeliustook

Saturday, July 08, 2006

Wide World of Shorts

So my flag football team made a good play in the last game! We picked up about fifteen yards! Something worked! We exclaimed from the sideline! Our play was a success! High-five with my assistant coach! Yesssss!

Wait -- a flag on the field.

Penalty on us. Illegal Shorts. Loss of down.

Of course. Illegal Shorts. I'd told everyone at the beginning of the year, no pockets. You can't have pocket-shorts in flag football. But our receiver on the play had pocket-shorts.

Wait. It's not just him. It's our other receiver, too. And our quarterback. And our cornerbacks. Half the team had Illegal Shorts. They'd all bought new black shorts to match our black uniforms. We looked sharp, marching back to our own goal-line.

So I called timeout and -- I'm sure Lombardi did this, too -- went through the crowd, asking individuals for their shorts. "Can I have your shorts?" "Hey, can I see your shorts? -- can I have those?" "Can you swap shorts with my backfield?"

We found some shorts, turned others inside out, and cobbled together a team, just in time to be beaten 20 to nothing.

I'm now 1 -17 lifetime as a coach. Pray for us.

Posted 7/8/2006 8:57 AM - 106 Views - 14 eProps - 9 comments

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9 Comments

That sounds like fun. I was homeschooled and got caught up in a stupid catch-22 situation that would not allow me to play on any football teams in the area. It wouldn't have been so upsetting if I wasn't good at it though.. I'm always competitive.. I don't even throw chairs when I get mad either.

Posted 7/8/2006 12:21 PM by Hawkeye101 - reply

Interesting how the same thing that got you booted out of KSBJ has now come home to roost on the flag football field.

Interesting.

Posted 7/8/2006 1:15 PM by DougHannah - reply

Look at this as a resume' building experience... "successful coaching experience except for fashion police."

Posted 7/8/2006 2:54 PM by RevJeffreyNE

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Whoa, I didn't know comments were back.... I thought I checked in about a week ago, too.

Haha, ah yes.... The great Dan Lifestyle.... Unfortunately (maybe fortunately) the roster for this year's Dan Lifestyle club is full. Try again next year. :)

I have a job -- I'm a bank teller. I did this last summer, so I just called my bank this year and asked if I could come back. This is actually the only job I've ever had. I never had any summer jobs until last year; I'm too lazy.

I'm not taking any summer classes -- I need a break from school every now and then. :)

I'm jealous of your Tivo. I wish I could not watch TV as well as you. Have you seen any movies lately?

Posted 7/8/2006 8:01 PM by befriendthemoose - reply

Brant,

If I could have one wish, I'd make you the new editor of Relevant magazine. I meant to say that a long time ago, but didn't.

And hi Dan.

~Brian

Posted 7/8/2006 10:03 PM by creationfreak316 - reply

I am a longtime reader, by the way. Keep being yourself and making it seem really funny.

Posted 7/8/2006 10:04 PM by creationfreak316 - reply

Ron Turner could relate to this.

Posted 7/8/2006 10:04 PM by SteveJ - reply

Haha, hi Brian.

Posted 7/10/2006 1:20 AM by befriendthemoose - reply

I love reading your posts, they're amusing, yet thought-provoking (i love those kinds of posts)

I remember freshman year at the UofO, I played on the flag football team for my dorms. I only allowed myself to play during the first game... we got beat 63-0... No, we didn't just get beat, we got SPANKED!

Then this past October I played two-hand touch football with a group from my church, and my team lost 63-56. So close, so close! I think I just suck at football, maybe even at life!

Posted 7/10/2006 11:07 AM by joeliustook